Toil and Trouble
by Laurus Nobilis
Summary: In which Harry Potter has to deal with a certain Witch of Dimension and Kimihiro Watanuki has to deal with an entire Wizarding World.


**Disclaimer:** The Harry Potter series belongs to JK Rowling. XXXHOLiC belongs to CLAMP.

**Author's Note:** Written for the ViceVersa challenge.

* * *

**Toil and Trouble**

Kimihiro looked at the portal with a mix of suspicion and apprehension. It didn't bring him the best of memories. Yuuko's grin wasn't making him feel any calmer, either.

"And exactly why," he asked, "am I supposed to go through that thing again? It was bad enough the first time!"

"I told you, I need to talk to someone," the witch explained.

"Then _you_ go! Why do I have to go and fetch them?"

"Because you're working for me, silly boy!" she laughed. "Come on, a little trip will be good for you."

"You didn't even tell me where I'm going!" he burst. Yuuko's grin became, if possible, broader. And eviler.

"You'll find out," she said.

Before Kimihiro could reply, she was pushing him into the portal. He hadn't even had time to prepare himself; it was a horrible sensation, like falling down a neverending, spiraling slide but without actually _sitting_ on anything. He felt he was going to throw up any minute now – and then it stopped.

He didn't dare to open his eyes and look around. The dazed feeling hadn't disappeared yet, and he had a terrible headache; he put his hands around his temples and forehead but, of course, it didn't stop the pain.

There were voices around him, speaking in a foreign language that he vaguely recognized as English. They sounded anxious, but he was still too dizzy to even try to understand what they were saying. After a few moments, however, he began to get a few words, and a name... not his.

"Harry?"

With a deep breath, he finally took his hands off his face, sat up and opened his eyes. There were more people with him than he had expected: a girl with bushy brown hair, a boy and a girl with red hair and freckles, a blonde girl who wore strange hair ornaments, and a plump boy with light brown hair. They all looked about his age; but, most of all, they looked extremely worried. That couldn't be a good sign, and the fact that they had fallen silent when he looked up wasn't exactly soothing.

The brown haired girl was the first one to speak again. What she said was easy enough to understand, but far from relieving.

"Oh, _no_."

o O o

By the time the world stopped spinning around him, Harry's wand was already out. He was indoors, but he didn't pause to look at the place; he had the feeling that he was not alone. He quickly turned around and faced a woman who was lounging on a couch and smoking.

"Where am I?" he asked, still pointing his wand at her. She blew a ring of smoke before she deigned to answer.

"In my shop," she said at last. "Tokyo, if you're interested."

"Japan? But you're speaking English..."

"You spoke English first," she told him, grinning.

Harry lowered his wand and thought about the situation for a moment. It didn't look like he was in danger, at least, but he was more than a little confused. That woman, on the other hand, didn't seem surprised at all by having a teenager suddenly appear in her house.

Which could only mean...

"You're a witch," he said. "Did you bring me here?"

"Not exactly," she replied. "What I did was send someone to where you used to be."

"Then why did I end up here?" he asked.

"Because there can't be two people at the exact same place," she said, as if the whole thing was obvious. "Matter is impenetrable."

Her answers weren't exactly helpful, and Harry wondered if all the questions he still had would be of any use. This woman was starting to give him a headache.

"_The exact same_..." he repeated, puzzled. "I don't get it."

"He's in your place," the witch told him. "But that needs to be balanced – so you're in his."

"WHAT? You can't just play with those things!" Harry shouted at her. "Why are you doing this? _Who are you_?"

"Just call me Yuuko," she said, and continued smoking as if nothing had happened.

o O o

Kimihiro took a long sip of Butterbeer. He was glad that they had taken him to a pub, because he was beginning to need a drink, even if he suspected that the only beer in this one was in the name.

It had taken him a while to get used to hearing and speaking English, but he was doing rather well, all things considered – the girl with the bushy brown hair seemed resigned to have her name mispronounced. What did feel strange was having complete strangers calling him by his first name and asking him to do the same.

At least they had believed him when he said his boss had sent him there through a magical portal. After all, he was now sitting in The Three Broomsticks, a pub in Hogsmeade... the only entirely wizarding village in Britain. By this point, he wasn't even _trying_ to think clearly.

"What I still don't understand," Hermione was saying for the millionth time, "is why Harry disappeared when you arrived here. What kind of spell is that?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "Yuuko never explains what she does. But it must be her fault, because she said she wanted to see someone."

"Yuuko?" intervened Luna, opening her eyes widely. "Do you mean Yuuko Ichihara? The Witch of Dimension?"

"You know about her?"

"Everyone knows," said Hermione, although the expressions of the other three proved the contrary. "There aren't many people who can send others to different worlds, are there?"

"I heard she uses plush toys to do that," Luna said, while the other girl rolled her eyes at her, "and that she has rooms full of strange things that she calls treasures, and she collects liquors from every dimension."

"Yeah, that's Yuuko," Kimihiro muttered, embarrassed.

"And I also heard," Luna continued, "that she had a torrid affair with –"

"Er, I don't mean to interrupt," said Ron, to Kimihiro's eternal gratefulness; Yuuko's love life wasn't something he was interested in. "But you'll have to return to school soon, and we still don't know what we'll do about... well, anything."

"We should tell McGonagall about it," Neville suggested. "She will know what to do."

"Who is Ma- Maku- ah... that person?" asked Kimihiro, struggling with the name and giving up.

"Our Headmistress," said Ginny. It was the first time she spoke since he had arrived – it had been her brother who introduced her – and she did so very quietly. "Neville is right. We have to tell her."

Without saying anything else, she turned around and walked away from the pub. Hermione quickly caught up with her, and they talked in low voices between them as the others followed them.

"Did I say something wrong?" Kimihiro asked Ron as they walked through the streets of Hogsmeade, a little behind from the others.

"It's not your fault," the other boy replied. "You see, Harry is... well, not exactly her boyfriend now, but they were dating for a while and they still fancy each other. It's complicated."

"Oh," he said quietly, hanging his head. "I am causing you a lot of trouble..."

"Kimihiro, look!" Luna interrupted them, pointing at an old looking house nearby. "That's the Shrieking Shack! It's the most haunted house in all of Britain."

"It doesn't feel very haunted," he said, but she didn't pay attention; she was too focused on showing him the wonders of the town.

"That's Zonko's Joke shop," she continued, "and that one there's Honeydukes, and that's Scrivenshaft's Quill Shop..."

In spite of the situation, Kimihiro soon found himself interested in Luna's tour. He decided to make the best of this trip, after all; once he got a job where nothing was trying to eat him, he might as well enjoy it. He entered many of the shops, spent a lot more money than he had expected (Hermione had accepted to change some of their money for his yens, saying that her parents would find those much easier to change at a bank than Galleons) and, by the time they reached Hogwarts, he had as many souvenirs as he could carry.

o O o

Harry took a deep breath, rubbing his temples. This was too strange, even by his standards. Not only had he randomly gone from Hogsmeade to Japan, without any Apparition or Portkey or _anything_, but he was in the weirdest company he could possibly imagine. He still didn't see what a title like "Witch of Dimension" had to do with granting wishes, he thought the two little girls who wandered around the house were downright creepy, and he didn't even know what to think about the black puffskein-thing and its drinking problem.

"You know," he said at last, "I really don't get this. I'm supposed to be trying to find Horcruxes, not sitting around in some shop..."

"Just relax for a while, will you?" Yuuko told him. "Until Watanuki comes back, you'll have to stay here. We could have a little chat."

"Um, I hope this doesn't sound too rude, but I really don't feel like talking," Harry replied. What was the point, anyway? She had soon made clear that she knew everything about him – and not just what everyone else knew. How she had heard about the prophecy's details or about Horcruxes was beyond his knowledge and, in all honesty, he wasn't sure he wanted to find out.

"Then do something," she said. "Make a dessert, for example. I heard you can cook."

He looked up, puzzled. Cook?

"Well, I used to make breakfast for the Dursleys, but I'm not an expert," he admitted. "I can try, though..."

"Perfect!" Yuuko exclaimed. She looked way too excited about this. "Mokona will help you in the kitchen! And with this, you won't have to worry about paying for your stay."

Harry opened his mouth to say something, closed it again, and then finally found words.

"You were going to make me pay?" he asked. "_You_ brought me here, and you were going to make me _pay_?"

"Everything has a price. Didn't I just explain that?" she said, not upset in the least. "But something sweet to eat will be a good payment. I'm sure you have some talent for that."

It looked like arguing wouldn't be useful, so he merely glared at her before he followed those strange little girls to the kitchen. Mokona bounced behind him, singing cheerfully. Harry had the distinct impression that it tried to be as annoying as possible, but after dealing with Dobby and Winky, this creature was just background noise.

Or so he thought until he started cooking. Bread and butter pudding should have been easy enough to make, if the kids and Mokona hadn't made such an effort to "be helpful". He practically had to chase them up the walls to keep them from ruining everything, and he shouted as much as if he was watching England play at the Quidditch World Cup.

He wondered why it felt so much _fun_ to do it. Soon enough, however, he stopped thinking and simply enjoyed himself. It had been quite a while since his greatest worry was not to burn a meal.

"Bread and butter pudding!" Yuuko squealed, delighted, when he presented her with the finished product. "Oh, I haven't tried one of these in _ages_! Did you put whisky in it?"

"Um, no," Harry muttered. "Was I supposed to?"

The witch hung her head in grief.

"Never mind," she sighed. "Just write down the recipe, will you? Watanuki will make one when he returns."

"Yay!" Mokona agreed.

That Watanuki guy, Harry thought, didn't have an easy job at all.

o O o

Hogwarts was a very strange school. To begin with, it was a castle; but that seemed almost normal when one started noticing things like the threatening forest, or the giant squid, or the ghosts. Kimihiro had the feeling that he wouldn't have enjoyed classes there at all.

Ginny called him before they entered the building, looking slightly embarrassed. They stayed a little behind; she said she wanted to talk to him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude to you," she told him. "This isn't your fault, after all... and I'm sure you don't want to be in Harry's place."

Kimihiro blinked.

"...what do you mean?"

"You don't know anything?" she asked, wide-eyed. "You haven't heard about the war?"

"The WHAT?"

He must have shouted, because the others turned around at that.

"He doesn't know about the war," Ginny repeated, answering their unspoken questions. Kimihiro suddenly felt very self-conscious, with everyone staring at him. So much for not being considered weird...

"Of course..." Hermione said at last. "Why would he know? It hasn't spread to Japan yet."

"_Yet_?"

"Well, we _are_ trying to stop it," said Ron. "But it's going to be difficult if Harry's on the other side of the world."

"Wait. I don't understand," Kimihiro told them, hoping he didn't sound as utterly confused as he felt. "Why is it easier with him? I thought he was just our age."

The others exchanged meaningful looks. He was feeling more and more uncomfortable by the second, but it was too late to regret stupid questions.

"You've never heard about Harry Potter?" asked Neville. Luna stared even harder, with a look of amazement on her face.

"You really must have been living under a rock."

"Just because someone's famous _here_ doesn't mean he's famous _everywhere_," Hermione pointed out; then she turned to Kimihiro. "Anyway, that's not the point. We should tell you about this before we go to see McGonagall. You better sit down, it's long."

They sat under one of the trees next to the lake. The story was long indeed, even if they only explained the basics to him and he had the feeling that they were purposefully leaving out a few key parts. Then again, he thought, he had no right to simply arrive and listen to Potter's life story. When they finished interrupting each other at last, he had a more or less clear idea of what was going on, no matter how many details were missing.

He _really_ wanted to go home now.

"Er, well," he managed to mutter, "I see why you want him back."

"I wonder if _he_ wants to come back," Ginny whispered. The silence was heavy; Neville's soft voice broke it after a few seconds.

"Of course he does," he said. "He decided to do this, and he knows we'll help him."

"Guess we should start by bringing him home," said Ron. "We better find McGonagall."

"But not all of us," said Hermione. "You three should return to your common rooms before you get in trouble, it's getting late. Ron and I can take care of this."

Ginny looked like she was about to protest, but gave up after a glaring duel with her brother.

"Fine," she said. "Good luck, Kimihiro. I hope we meet again someday, without so many problems."

"Yeah," Neville agreed. "Perhaps we'll get to be friends when it's all over."

Before she said anything, Luna tore a bit of parchment and scribbled something on it.

"Here," she said as she gave it to him; it was an address. "Write, will you? I've always wanted an exotic pen friend."

"Sure," he promised, unable to hold back a chuckle. It was weird – he barely knew them, but he felt he could get along with them easily. It was the magic, perhaps, the fact that he wasn't the odd one out.

As soon as they had left, Ron and Hermione took him to see the Headmistress. She was a stern woman, who was very kind to him but looked as if she could be quite scary when she wanted to. She listened to the whole story with her lips tightly pursed, and only spoke when she had heard it all.

"Miss Granger, please tell Professor Flitwick to come," she said, her voice rather tense. "I need his help to set up a Portkey."

Hermione did as she was told and, while they waited for her, McGonagall explained her plan. She told Kimihiro what a Portkey was, and that it could take him back to Japan.

"I need Professor Flitwick to help me set an extra charm on it – Charms are his specialty, you see – because we want it to take you to wherever Harry is, even if we aren't sure of the exact location. Once you are there, you must hand it to Harry so he can come back. Or, to be more precise, you should throw it to him and let him catch it. If you are both touching it when the second spell is activated, you will return to England along with him."

Kimihiro could only nod. If this thing was remotely similar to Yuuko's portal, the journey back was going to be anything but pleasant. He didn't have much time to think about it, however, since Hermione soon returned with a tiny old man. Professor Flitwick greeted him courteously before he and McGonagall prepared the spells.

What they gave him was a quill – the first random object they found, he thought somewhat bitterly, but didn't dare to say anything aloud. He barely had time to thank them and say goodbye before he felt something pulling at him, and he closed his eyes.

o O o

"De-li-cious," Yuuko said as she put down her plate, "even without the whisky. A very good payment indeed."

"That reminds me," Harry said. "You never really answered me, when I asked why I was here."

She _had_ to answer this time, he thought. Even if she had avoided it when he first asked, she must have had a reason to bring him all the way to Japan. No matter how crazy she was, she couldn't have taken all that trouble just for some pudding.

"Well," she replied, grinning at him, "you are in a shop, aren't you? You obviously need to buy something."

Harry gritted his teeth and took a deep breath. This was beginning to get on his nerves.

"That would be if _I_ had chosen to come," he said, trying to sound calm and failing miserably at it. "But _you_ brought me."

"I brought you here, yes. In a way," she conceded. "But if you could get into the shop, it means you have a wish."

A wish... of course he had one. It was quite a big one, in fact. As much as Harry would have loved to have a family, he was almost certain that the Mirror of Erised would show him something different if he looked into it now, something that was just as impossible to get.

"I wish I had a normal life," he sighed, looking at the wall so he wouldn't have to face her. "No Voldemort, no prophecies, no scars. No anything."

From the corner of his eye, he could see Yuuko smiling a little, as if she had been expecting to hear that answer. Not that it was very hard to guess, he thought, considering his situation. Yet her voice was much softer, almost kind, when she spoke again.

"That would have a great price."

"I know," Harry replied. "I would have lived as a Muggle, wouldn't I? I would have stayed with the Dursleys, and gone to Stonewall High, and be Harry the orphan forever."

"No. It would be much worse than that," Yuuko told him. He couldn't help but turn to look at her. She seemed much more serious all of a sudden, older and wiser. It was almost frightening.

"The past cannot be changed," she continued. "If you made that wish now – if you chose to forget about Voldemort, and live your own, normal life – you would have to stick with your decision. You would know that, because you put your own happiness first, someone else had to take your place."

"You mean Neville?" Harry asked, horrified. "Or – or that boy you sent to England?"

"Perhaps. Or your friends, or the rest of the English wizards. And, for all you know, they might be fighting a losing battle. Because Voldemort chose _you_."

"And I have to choose how to face him," he said quietly. It was almost like Dumbledore had said, wasn't it? Except that, back then, he hadn't known that _this_ was also an option. He hadn't known that he could simply step away.

It was strange to realize that, even so, his decision wouldn't change.

"I can't do that," he said, and he smiled a little in spite of himself. It felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. "I have to finish this myself. It's one thing if my friends are in danger because _they_ choose to help me, but... I can't leave them alone."

"I knew you were a good child," Yuuko said, smiling again.

"Then why did you do all this, if you knew it wouldn't change anything?"

"Ah, but it did change something," she answered. "This way, it really was your decision."

She was right about that, Harry had to admit; he did feel much better, in spite of everything. But he still couldn't believe that she had gone out of her way to show him that.

"Wait," he said. "It's your job to grant wishes, right? Did Dumbledore...?"

"I don't reveal professional secrets," she interrupted him. However, she was grinning as she said that, and Harry had the strong suspicion that there was an enormous stack of sherbet lemons hidden somewhere in her shop.

"Okay, just one last question," he told her. "Can't you help us? You know, about Voldemort?"

"I _am_ very powerful," she replied and, to Harry's surprise, let out a chuckle, "but even I can't take care of more than one evil overlord at a time."

He blinked, but she waved her hand dismissively.

"Don't worry. He's not interested in you."

Harry was about to say something when a boy of about his age appeared out of nowhere, looking terribly dizzy and holding a quill.

"...Watanuki?"

"Potter?"

"Ah, looks like we all know each other!" Yuuko exclaimed. "I'm glad you two could meet! I was wondering how they'd send you here..."

"You were WONDERING?" Watanuki burst. He was speaking in English; perhaps to follow the conversation, Harry thought, or because he'd got used to it during his absence. "You didn't plan on, oh, I don't know – BRINGING ME BACK?"

"I don't know how you can work for her," Harry told him, suddenly relieved and not caring at all that the witch was still listening. "She's mental."

"Yeah, I know," the other boy sighed; then he seemed to remember something. "Er, they said you should catch this. It will take you to England."

"Sure," he said. "I guess it's goodbye, then. And – thanks."

Yuuko smiled, but she didn't say anything else. The last thing Harry saw were Mokona and the girls waving at him as he caught the quill that Watanuki threw into his hands.

He opened his eyes again in McGonagall's office. She was there with Flitwick, and also, as he expected, Ron and Hermione. They all looked relieved to see him.

"You all right?" asked Ron.

Harry couldn't help but smile.

"Better than ever."

o O o

Kimihiro felt as if he could ramble on and on about Yuuko's evil ways until the end of time, but he soon discovered that, once in a while, he had to stop to breathe. The fact that the witch took those opportunities to make fun of him didn't make it any better.

"...and they were _at war_! Do you hear? I could have been KILLED! And why did you send me there, anyway?"

"I can't believe it took you so long to ask that," Yuuko laughed. "I did it because there was a lesson to be learned."

He hung his head, blushing a little.

"Well, yes. I guess so..." he admitted. "There are people who have it a lot worse than me, right? I shouldn't complain so much."

"Who said the lesson was for _you_?" Yuuko interrupted him, poking him on the head with that annoying rubber ducky that she always seemed to materialize out of nowhere. "You are too self-centered!"

"I am _not_ self-centered!" he defended himself. "Look! I even brought you something!"

He looked for the bag with everything he had bought in Hogsmeade and took a bottle out of it, with a triumphant expression. Yuuko gasped.

"Ogden's Old Firewhisky!" she exclaimed. "Oh, this brings back memories –"

"I knew you would charge me something," Kimihiro muttered. "I don't know for _what_, but you would."

"Well, I _was_ going to tell you to make dessert," she admitted, with that usual evil grin of hers. "But we still have some of the bread and butter pudding that Harry made."

"With whisky!" Mokona added.

Kimihiro sighed, between resigned and amused, and braced himself to face normality.


End file.
